Bingo

Someone writing in The Spectator recently mentioned a new kind of bingo game - "wine bingo". A crowd get together at someone's house and do a wine tasting..... I'm afraid I didn't understand the game so it's pointless my trying to explain it; also, it seemed utterly dull and boring and not the sort of game I'd like to take part in (see who could drink the fastest tumbler of wine might be more in my line).
But the word "bingo" brought to mind a wedding reception I went to years ago. An aquaintance of mine, big drinker, had married a nurse, big drinker, and the reception was in a pub. I don't recall there being much food available but there were plenty of drinks and the sort of people invited were all people who could"put it away", as they say.
There were no speeches, just hard drinking.... Then someone got on a loud speaker and announced that the bingo session was about to commence.
"Bingo!" exclaimed my drunken friend, the groom. "We don't want this."
So he started making a fuss, complaining that he had come here to celebrate his wedding not to play ******* bingo.
"What are you going to do?" my wife asked me.
"Play bingo, of course," I said. "Haven't had a game of bingo for years."
So we were all presented with cards and play commenced. Except that the groom wasn't going to let this happpen. He bellowed things at the caller, fell over chairs, squared up to a harmless looking bloke who tried to come to his assistance and was so unpleasant that.... Well, the fact is he was thrown out.
It is the only time in my life that I have seen someone thrown out of their own wedding party.
But no one cared much. We were all heads down looking for the full house. I'm not sure but I do have the singular feeling that his newly aquired wife was there in the crowd, head down.... No, it's just wishful thinking.