Belief

Alain de Botton has written a book called "Religion for Atheists" in which he posits the idea that the new breed of fundamentalist atheists, so to speak, miss out on some of the things that an established religion possesses. I can see his point: Richard Dawkins and Co. seem to me to be so anti every form of religion that they aspire to a wholly (not holy) form of knowledge that seems to be bereft of feeling; there is an anger manifest in their attacks on religions; they can not or will not see that there is anything in those religions but a stubborn belief in things which are, simply, unbelievable. In short, they think that knowledge is superior to belief and that knowledge requires proof.
I tend to think this way too but I still have that feeling within me, brought about no doubt by an upbringing in the Welsh valleys where to be anything but a believer in one or other of the Protestant churches' beliefs would be similar to holding hands with the devil. So, I suppose I have been brain-washed to a certain extent by my experience of religion and chapels and the pleasant people, usually, within them.
So, though I now, like de Botton, can't accept most if not all of the beliefs that religious people take for granted, I still have that inkling to enjoy those aspects of church ways that appeal to my ascetic side if not quite spiritual side.
I like the ceremonies associated with some religious denominations, especially those of the C of E; whenever I stay at a hotel I go staright to the chest of drawers to see if Gideon has left a bible there and if he hasn't I'm disappointed; one of my favourite books (which I have started about twenty times but failed to finish) is Thomas Mann's "Joseph and his Brethren" for its high-mindedness and for the wonderful story itself, told in the bible in a page or two but in over 500 pages in this book.
My father said to me; "You must read this before you die." I don't think he meant that it would help me when I get to "the other side" but that it would help me appreciate the one on this side.
Must start it again. Incidentally, every time I take up the book to read on from where I left off, I don't; I start from the beginning again.